Communication is one of the fundamental elements to a happy, healthy, strong relationship. It is also one of the areas that couples also struggle with and has the greatest impact on how a couple handles problems, conflicts and takes on day to day activities and scenarios. Communication is not only knowing how to communicate your own feelings and needs, but also becoming skilled at being able to be receptive to your partners feelings, needs and desires. Communication breakdowns can lead to relationship issues such as feeling neglected and alone, lack of trust, not feeling supported, affect sex and intimacy and many things in between.
Exercise #1 Going for walk together
Spending time together is essential in building connection, trust, and emotional intimacy. A distraction free way to spend some time together and get a moment to chat, is by going on walks. Walking and creating movement helps to break down barriers in communication which can be there, especially when you don’t spend enough time engaged quality time together. Going on walks can encourage more open communication, release some endorphins, change the scenary and allow you and your partner much needed space to express yourselves to one another.
Reading a book together
If you ever find that you and your partner struggle finding new things to talk about, or even if you are just looking for an activity to do with one another, it can be fun to read a book together as a couple. You can read one of the latest best sellers that cover interests from murder mystery, non fiction, politics, to adventure series…whatever sounds interesting. Maybe even take turns choosing the books for your quality time together. Or if you would like something a little meatier, to get deeper with relationship help books, you can try a few of these. https://www.tckpublishing.com/books-for-couples-to-read-together/ Reading a book together can provide you with new conversation topics, and can allow you to explore new ideas as a couple. Sometimes it’s easier to analyze situations in books than it is to analyze what’s going on in your relationship. Having conversations about fictional conflicts and struggles can inspire you to address these problems in real life. It can be fun to involve other couples in this process, creating a couples book club can inspire even more open and different discussions.
Doing something spontaneous for each other
Communication isn’t always verbal, so practice the art of non verbal communication, by doing something spontaneous for your partner. It’s important to remember that this is done without any expectation of reciprocation. Bonus points if this is your partner’s preferred way to give or receive love. If that is the case, it’s extra important to keep up with these small spontaneous acts so that your partner feels loved and supported by you. Here are some ideas to get you started.
- Take Them To Your Favorite Place.Â
- Steal Some Kisses. …Â
- Make or pick up a snack/meal
- Give them a massage
- Gift Them Something Special. …Â
- Plan A Shower With Them. …Â
Set aside specific nights/times for intimacy
Intimacy is a big part of a romantic relationship and it is the place where cracks start to show when connection and healthy communication is not practiced. If you find that you and your partner are in a dry spell (due to business or a period of distance or anything else) it can be helpful to intiate sensual or intimate time together. This may feel a little prescribed at first, afterall scheduling intimacy often doesn’t come off as super sexy….but it can also give you something to look forward to during a busy week. Making time for intimacy, even if it’s not sex, is critical to maintaing a happy relationhsip. Even if you and your partner are being intimate regularly, it can be fun to schedule in intimate time during a time you’re not used to. Do you normally have sex at night? Pencil in some intimate time in the morning! Cultivating your intimate and sexual relationship as a couple will make you feel closer, which can inspire you to communicate more openly about your feelings and emotions.
Answering a series of harmless/fun questions
When we can put a little bit more fun into asking questions and checking in with our partner in a fun more loving way. Sometimes life gets hectic and we forget to check in with one another. Getting out of the routine of asking things like “how was your day”, and “are you feeling supported? ” can cause real communication breakdowns in your relationship. By making sure to check-in with your partner frequently, it will help to open up the communication doors. I love the question, “What is on your heart today?” We oftentimes communicate so much about schedules, and the day to day we forget to check in with what is on our hearts. When you are able to communicate more often, things are less likely to buildup and become a significant problem or create resentments. Daily practice of talking openly will lead to feeling more comfortable coming to your partner about bigger things.
